Saturday, September 8, 2012

Why You Should Not Get Back Together With Your Ex Boyfriend.

Yeah I know. Every girl wants that story. You date for a couple years, break up for a couple weeks (or months, or YEARS) and find out that you really can't live without him. You send the risky text "Hey. I've been thinking about you (I miss you). How have you been?" and he responds with the "You've been on my mind too. I still love you. Please lets work us out."


Shit, that is a word that unifys me and him. Together. "Us." A two letter word that you can't really define. And it hits you. All the memories and laughs and good, fun shit that you did together. Allllllll of that comes flooding back. The time he created scavenger hunts for you, bought you tickets to the concert you were dying to see, Victoria Secret gift cards (which really was a gift for him), the way he knew you don't like crust on your sandwhiches and have a crazy, obsession for Starbucks coffee. He knows everything about you and you about him so uh, duh! This is the best idea ever. But you see, all that is no good. Do you not remember the breakup? Why you left him? The rumors spread, the games played, the tears you cried? No, you're not remembering that. Wanna know why? Keep reading.

1. You're focusing on the positive.
- Yes, its easy to replay over and over the good part of your relationship. When your heart is trying to heal, it focuses on overglorifying the person you're trying to forget. Honestly, your heart is bullshitting you. Its holding on to what's comfortable which brings me to number 2.

2. Uhhhh, it's just comfortable.
- You don't have the shave your legs everyday, try super hard to impress him with quirky jokes. He's comfortable. He's seen you dressed up, dressed down, dressed ugly. It feels natural, exciting even to rekindle with someone you once loved. It's the dramatic, can't live without you love you come to find you still need. Nope. Wrong again.

3. You're two different people now.
- Time changes people. Maybe he has turned into someone you wouldn't like or you are now someone he doesn't like. Being apart shifts your personalities as people you've met since the breakup have altered your behavior. Maybe you are so different, you just don't click anymore. Take a hint, sweetheart.

4. The 2nd "honeymoon" stage will go away.
- The new and exciting stage will fade. Yeah this shit isn't real! He will go back to his nagging, annoying self reminding you of why you left him in the first place. He may have changed, but his roots are still there. All the reasons you left will come flooding back faster than the happy emotions the day you decided to give it another go.

Trust is the underlying factor of any relationship. Being apart for weeks, months, or even years can break that trust, or whatever is left there of. You don't know who he's been with, or what he's done since you and it's none of your damn business. It's called a breakup because it is broken. Don't hurt yourself even more trying to piece it back together.