when you don’t like someone, {aka: you’d shove them in front of a bus. aka: you wouldn’t pee on them if they were on fire.} you have a tendency to elaborate on things you've heard they have done in order to make them look like the lowest face in society. okay maybe that was a little dramatic, but i was asked to blog on the topic of your boyfriend’s crazy ex-girlfriend.
i know you don’t like her and i know you’ve probably facebook stalked whatever pictures they have left together from a year ago at her cousin’s house and i know you’ve probably compared yourself and thought “she’s only kinda pretty. she’s not that pretty right? hey, kristin come over here and look at her! i’m prettier than her right? her nose. girllllllll, your nose. doesn’t her eye have a kinda weird squinty thing? HAHA squinty. that’s what we will call her. and what’s up with that braid in her hair? what are you, five? she has blonde hair. blondes are psycho. i’ve heard how crazy she was. crazy bitch, I DARE YOU TO CONTACT HIM NOW."
i’ve met some guys who have dated some bat shit cray girls who need to be admitted into a mental institute. there are ex-girlfriends that still sleep in his old t-shirt, & those that call your boyfriend crying and begging him back. they taunt him with the comfort they both once shared and show up at the bars he’s at in this sexy little dress trying to show off. they text him “you look good tonight” from across the room and walk up to him demanding an explanation when he doesn’t respond. they buy him a birthday present and ship themselves to his house in a cake.……. and they’ve been apart for 4 years. i could go on and on and on. either run or punch her in the face and move on with your day. those are your two options for that.
but back to your boyfriend’s ex - you don’t know anything about this girl nor really anything substantial about her and your boyfriends old relationship. but you have heard crazy stories of her and how she was holding onto his phone before, cried in his room one time because he wasn’t paying attention to her and confronted this drunk girl who grabbed and kissed him on the bar two years ago. you’ve heard that his friends totally hated her when they were together and never wanted her around and his family knew she’d never last. all she did was bring drama to the table. uhhh, freak! she’s like not even that pretty anyway. you and all your friends agree.
what’s funny is how stories get twisted, exaggerated, and blown out of proportion. maybe by him, maybe by another girl who doesn’t like her for whatever reason, or maybe for no reason at all. people have this need to compose these over the top stories in order to be entertaining. you know, the time she had his phone was really her just calling his mom to say hi. the time she cried in his room had nothing to do with him not giving her attention. maybe she had just had a bad day at work, was pissed at her boss and drank one too many martinis. and the time she confronted the girl that kissed him was because well.. um, duh?! what girl wouldn’t yell at another girl who kissed their man. that’s not crazy. you’re crazy if you don’t. and the rumor about people hating her? that’s kinda contradictory because they still catch up with her every now and then and hope to see her doing well.
i guess what i'm saying is don't take everything you hear at face value. especially if you weren't around to experience what happened yourself. and of course you weren't there. they were dating then - awkward.
mainly what I’m saying is (shocker!) not every guy has a crazy ex-girlfriend. some guy’s ex-girlfriends are pretty cool and genuinely wish your boyfriend the best, found the good in goodbye, and have no intention of messing up what you two have. as crazy as it sounds, some ex-girlfriends move on with their life! what?! you mean to tell me she’s not trying to sabotage us? i’m pretty sure those ex-girlfriends don’t exist, right?
i think that some ex-girlfriends just have to handle what people say because it’s inevitable. people always talk and make up rumors especially for the sake of boredom, if in fact she isn’t a lunatic. but she’s human too and has probably made mistakes before. she’s probably acted out of line because we’re not perfect. think of the times you’ve embarrassed yourself too. okaaaay then. and i'm not sticking up for your boyfriend's ex-girlfriend. i'm just saying she's something you shouldn't be concerning yourself with or worried about unless she's at your doorstep with a machete. just remember, to believe hardly none of what you hear and only half of what you see.
so before you judge her, consider this thought: people tend to date a similar type. you see a trend in characteristics that people are attracted to time and time again. so before you go deem her “crazy” to all your friends, take a step back. he’s dating you. he saw something in you that he finds worthy of committing to. things he’s seen worthy in other girls before you. characteristics that both of you probably possess. you two probably would be friends outside of these harsh society walls. so when you define her, you’re really defining yourself.
hmmm.. now that’s what’s crazy.
xo
-A
follow me on twitter: @agcrute
